'Goodbye'

 

I said 'Goodbye' 

and I did not cry. 

No tears were shed

It was long overdue

This break-up 

with the old 'me'. 

It took me all these years

to find the treasure

inside me. 

I was led down 

a rabbit hole 

by so many lies. 

A fraud was committed

against me

I was made a party to it too. 

Unsuspecting I followed

and so became 

my own enemy. 

Now lies exposed

I stand vindicated

I realized my foolishness

in trusting those who 

meant ill for me

In loving those who hated me. 

Goodbye to the old

is actually the turning of a page,

a welcome to a new beginning.

How can something new

something that infuses new life

and gives you hope be bad? 

Henrietta

14th November 2022

No More Chasing the Wind

 Blowing in the Wind - Image by Hartwig HKD

A lifetime of chasing the wind
Running after something or someone
Has finally come to an end.
I learned the truth
and it set me free
from all the incompleteness I felt.

Isn't it crazy that you seeks answers
all over the world
and finally find the answer is in you!
It's a relief
It's a joy!
It is final - I am home.

It is time to bid goodbye
to those who chose to bail out
to those who pushed me away.
It is time to acknowledge
those who chose to stay
those who stood by me through thick and thin.

We may be far away from a friend
But when we meet it's as though we met just yesterday
Time cannot separate those who belong.
Thank God for friends who by their presence
by their words or actions show us
that they really care.

There are enough empty words in this world
It's better to not speak what we don't mean
It's better to let go of those who have nothing to say.
Today I am thankful because I was overlooked
by some who were shallow
their truth so evident, so visible.

Everything we say or choose not to say
everything we do or choose not to do
reveals something about us.
What are our actions or inactions saying about us?
No matter how many masks you wear
The truth will show itself to the keen observer.

Lies have only so much life
When two and two are put together
Someone will realize it is four and not twenty two.
The truth no matter how sour
is the only best friend a person can have
Be wise, choose the truth, choose freedom from lies.

I AM FREE AT LAST!

~ Henrietta Decruz
   Copyright 2020

Change can be good

Sometimes we tend to hang on

To old things

Old memories

Old places

People we once knew

Who went away

Phases in our life

A time of joy or love

Loyalty to memories

Over loyalty to oneself

We tend to shun change

As though it is betrayal

But the truth is

Change is good

What does not change

Stagnates, decays and dies.

Change is proof you are alive

Change means you’re on a journey

You’re still on the way

To achieving something

A dream, a goal, a purpose

Change is process

Change is learning

Change changes us

You and I are not static

We move

We grow

We learn

We understand

We analyse

We thrive

We meditate

Looking back at difficult times

There is always something to learn

There are mysteries to solve

Questions to find answers to

Old patterns to decode

Delink from and discard

Who did what and why

Where is the key?  

Once out of that process

It is time to bid goodbye

To the past

There is no point in lingering

To smell the stale air

Of a bygone time

Come out of the stupor

Embrace the fresh new air

Change is new life

A seed turning into a sapling

Flowers turning into fruits

Our life is a circle

It keeps on turning

Just as the clocks hands

Keep moving

Move on, embrace change!

~ Henrietta Decruz 

(C) 2017

The Prison

She sat and cried

Held there at that place

Against her will.

Like a bird in a cage

Fluttering away

Hitting the bars

Losing strength

Flying in one place.

Like a prisoner

Chained to her cell

Looking out through bars

Longing to be freed.

Unseen unknown

The walls, the boundaries

Held her captive

An emotional prison

She longed to break free from.

Life moved on for those around

In Technicolor

What light, what speed

What great special effects!

While she had to

Make herself content

With just black & white

In slow motion.

I want to go

I want to grow

I want to breathe

Freely!

She cried.

Within her heart

Her voice resounded

Like echoes

Loud and clear

But on the outside

They were only muffles

Sighs and groans.

Cries that went unheard

Because no one cared

To know about her welfare.

Whenever she spoke

A word about her misery

They frowned.

“Look at her complaining!”

“Everything is fine...”

“You’re just imagining it...”
“How can you talk like that?”

“That’s not how it’s supposed to be!”

“You should yield, give in

Listen to your tormentor...”

Little did they know

Their advice meant

‘Give up the right to live

The way you want

The way you were meant to

The way that would fulfil you.’

How can anyone tell you

Not to be yourself

Not to breathe

Not to live

A complete life?

Boundaries are fine

When they keep you safe

And help define you

Give you stability.

Boundaries kill

When they snuff the life out of you

When they restrict your being

When they block movement

And the vision to live

A complete life.

Boundaries stunt

Degrade and kill

The free spirit, initiative

The unfolding of uniqueness.

It stunts the stature

Of a human being

A timeless mortal

And makes her

A mere statistic

A birth and death entry

In a municipal register.

Some long for freedom so much

That they take the one way ticket

Of no return

When the breath is stilled

And the heartbeat stops forever.

“Not for me!” she said.

“I’m going to be free!

No matter what comes

I am going to breathe

To venture out of the boundaries

And live!!!”

I am not going to be content

With mere survival!

I am going to get out of the prison

To experience the joy

Of being myself

No matter what anyone thinks about me!

 I choose my freedom

My right to live

To be the person

I was born to be.

Too bad if someone doesn’t understand

Bad for them, not me!!

Goodbye pseudo boundaries

Goodbye prison walls

Goodbye the stench of suffocating air

Goodbye emotional blackmailers

Goodbye old life!

I have finally decided

It’s time to be free

It’s time to be me

It’s time to reach out for a star.

It’s time to dream

And give it a go

Make it come true!

There may be storms

There may be rains

There may be suffering

But it won’t be in vain.

I get to be me

I get to live

I get to dream again!

So Adios!

Sayonara!

Auf wiedersehn!

Goodbye prison.

It’s time for you

To be locked and put away

In a prison called the past.

-       -   Henrietta Decruz