Showing posts with label story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label story. Show all posts

05 November 2024

Do You Know the 'Real' You?



All our lives we live

Thinking we know ourselves.

Imagine the surprise

When you realize

That everything you believed

About yourself

Is a figment

Of someone else’s imagination.



Yes, there are many narratives for a story

The person who lived that story

Knows the whole truth about it,

Or is it really so?

Sometimes the person who lived it

Has also been told a lie

By someone else

For their own selfish interests.



What would it feel like

To realize you are not the centre

The main protagonist

Of your own story?

To learn that you were so naive

You believed a lie

And lived a half life

All your life...



It would feel like betrayal

Wouldn’t it?

To realize that you trusted the liars

More than you trusted yourself

And to realize the truth

That you barely know yourself

That you are miles away

From self-knowledge.



Then you scramble

To pick up the pieces

Of the you, you remembered

Yourself to be.

You step away from the world

Find a comfy corner

Where you can hear

Your own heart beat.



You shun the ones

Who lied to you

And embrace your one true self

Still yet unknown

For you realise

This bond with yourself

Is lifelong

And will last until your last breath.



You allow tears

To run down your face

And look and relook

At every detail

Every memory

In a bid to see beyond

The false narratives

The lies.



When you learn

They made themselves

The hero of your story

And hid you under the carpet

Every time you did

Something good

You feel the anger,

The grief hit you.



You realize your feelings

Were held back

Each and every time

So much that you felt life was shallow

And now you understand

Why you felt

The way you felt

You were not allowed to be you.



It is time to take back

What is yours!

It is time to shun the lies

And embrace the truth

Time to let those feelings flow

And for the liars to know

They cannot have you

They have no right over your life.



At last it feels good

To know the real ‘You’

Finally you know

You are a person

You have the right to be heard

To be counted

To speak for yourself

To live for yourself.



Henrietta Decruz







15 March 2017

No Regrets

Talking to someone
Retracing steps in life
I realized
I’ve come a long way
I learned
I have grown
I rejoice
I have no regrets.

Though pain stabbed
My inner being
Grief almost
Maimed my soul
My heart cried
Till every tear had run dry
I survived
I lived to tell my story.

At every juncture
Every difficult phase
My heart though grieved
Had made the right decisions
I loved
I gave
I helped
I cared for others.

I thank God
Who has been
My Helper
My Counselor
My Comforter
My Guide
My Strength
My Protector.

Years of pain
Numbed my mind
Yet He kept me going
He kept me sane
His love a balm
Over every wound
His words so loving
It gave me life.

It may seem
I am a hero
But I know
The real hero
Is God, the One
Who silently shielded
Carried and held me 
Till I found myself. 

- Henrietta Decruz


17 February 2017

Healing and Restoration - Everyone Needs it!!

Hello Everyone!

For those who follow my blog closely, you must have wondered where I disappeared! Well for the truth to be told, there are times when we need to take a dive within ourselves. We need to search and ponder and bring to a sense of order to our memories, our sense of who we are and whom we belong to... and also the meaning of life and what we really want to do with it. 

I felt it was time and so I took off. I needed to come to terms with my own life story and all the life experiences I have been through in this lifetime. I'm happy to say that I have found peace and refreshing at last! 

During this time I was really blessed to attend a 3 Day Workshop on Child Emotional Trauma and Trauma Informed Care organized by the Child Healing Centre, Bangalore. The trainers of the workshop were Ruby Johnston and Lynn Johnston of the LAMb International Canada and USA. George Ebenezer, the Managing Director of Child Healing Centre and Santhosa Samsara Social Charitable Trust was instrumental in organizing this workshop. 

The workshop was a great tool in helping me come to terms with my own life story. It also helped me understand how children from hard places needed to be cared for. One of the things Ruby Johnston said was that each child had a unique story and only they 'own' that story. It is the story of their life. 

I've spent years trying to grapple with my life story because I too am a child from a hard place. I find various reactions from people when I share a painful truth about my life and most of the time it would make me regret sharing as people don't understand where I am coming from or my reasons for sharing them. Some people think I am speaking ill of the 'persons' in my story but there is a difference between saying something to malign a person and speaking the truth about what happened to you. 

This workshop helped me realize that I own my story, my story is about what really happened to me. My story belongs to only me and not anyone else even in my family. No one else may understand my story or have felt what I went through. They don't have to because they have their own story! This brought me great peace and restoration because finally I could deal with all the voices and fingers that were pointing at me as though I am doing something wrong.  

I would encourage everyone to take time to go deep within and set right the doubts and questions you have about your past. Find answers and set the past free so you can live your life in a meaningful and fruitful way. Only when we own our identity completely having made peace with our past, can we live in the present in a natural and confident way.  

It is not easy for those who have not had 'normal' lives to do this. Not everyone comes from 'normal families.' Many people have had experiences of trauma at some point in their lives. Some are still facing it in their present. The workshop taught me that living with consistent pain for a number of years has a deep impact in how the brain functions and it can change the personality of the person too. 

It is sad that most of the time people living with pain are advised to not speak about it to anyone. Our society likes to behave like a monster that forces them to hide their sorrows and trauma under a carpet! This is nothing less than swallowing people alive as it inhibits them from finding their 'real self' and living a fulfilling and meaningful life! 

https://feminisminindia.com/2017/01/09/visiblizing-taboo-child-sexual-abuse-india/In some countries like the US and in Europe trauma care is very advanced and professionals assist such persons to overcome the challenges they face in life. There is no stigma attached, so those who are broken in spirit and broken-hearted can reach out and get the help they need. However, most countries have a long way to go to get there. India is one of them!

My understanding of children who have gone through trauma has increased a great deal thanks to Olga Martin, the founder of Street-Heroes Of India (SOI). SOI has been helping children from hard places who are housed in children's home find healing and restoration through various kinds of therapy including art, music, drama, dance and the like.

Thanks to George Ebenezer's efforts through Child Healing Centre, Bangalore things are beginning to change! They have planned a set of similar workshops across India! I believe this will help bring the change that India needs so much! If you are interested in participating in any of their future workshops do drop him a line!

Let us bring real change to India! Let us bring awareness in this nation so that children from hard places can find healing and restoration and live a life of peace!  

~ Henrietta Decruz 

If you would like to read more, do check these links: 
Adverse Childhood Experiences 
Can Family Secrets Make You Sick? 
The Toll of Childhood Trauma 




http://nadaindia.info/

15 October 2016

Butterfly

Be all that you were born to be!
It is a journey.
The ugly will pass away
Fade into the past
Beautiful times will come
And walk with you into the sunset.
Do not grieve over what couldn't be
Be excited about all that is coming
Spread your wings and fly away
Spread your wings and fly....
Your story is not over yet! 

~ Henrietta D

25 September 2016

My Prize Winning Short Story - The Clue

This is a story I wrote as my entry to the All Kerala Story Writing Competition 2016 organized by the Rama Varma Club in Kochi, Kerala.

I am very happy that they selected my entry for a special Consolation Prize! Here is the story I submitted.


THE CLUE


Nayantara sat still. The sun put on a final display of its splendor, its golden light shining over the waves of the sea. Birds were flying home, their graceful forms dotting the sky. The sea was lazy, waves moving silently towards the shores. People walked on the beach, some chatting and others lost in their own world.

No one noticed this lone woman sitting by herself. Lines of worry imprinted on her forehead, the lone witness of her travails.

She took a deep breath and looked up at the sky. A wry smile curled her lips. She had made her decision. The plan was on. Getting through this would decide life and death for her. She got up, slowly picked her belongings and made her way home.

Before she went to sleep that night, Nayantara picked up the old box that had her favorite things. There were paintings, poems, photographs, doodles and tiny things that wouldn’t mean anything to anyone else. These things represented a part of her life. They reminded her of the girl she used to be… happy, curious, full of wonder and trusting. She wanted to pick that girl and hug her… if only she could find her again.

The next morning was like all mornings, hurrying to work, the rush on the bus and the traffic. She worked in a huge campus surrounded by hundreds like her. Yet there was no connection with anyone. She felt like an island in the ocean.

Time at work was dry and dead. The hours flew by, work pressure to meet deadlines, lunchtime with some colleagues who tried to make conversation, waiting for the day to end, the bus ride home.

On the bus she noticed young girls conversing with abandon. An old woman sat gracefully. Her white hair reflecting peace and tranquility. She looked longingly at the woman, trying to find the secret behind the poise and peace of mind.

‘Peace…’ she thought to herself, ‘When will I find peace? How can I make peace with myself and my life… after knowing what I know?’ Her eyes revealed the pain she felt but no one noticed it.

She made herself a cup of tea. The steaming cup welcomed her to relax. She perched herself in her favorite corner, hugged a pillow and picked her cup. She decided it was time to work on her plan.

She pulled out her journal and started a fresh section.

ONE.  The girl in the yellow dress admiring the flowers. She described her memory and relived every bit of it. At the end of it, she could see herself as a little girl with short straight hair smiling at her through the page.

TWO. The adventurer. She smiled as the recalled the trip to the mountains when she was a teen. She and her friends were walking up the stream, singing songs and enjoying the clear sweet air. Up on the top of the mountain they found an old abandoned church. The walls of the church had cracked open after an earthquake centuries ago.  

She peered through the glass windows, wanting to see more. “Let’s go inside,’ she told her friends. No one liked the idea. She took a round of the place and found a way to go inside the church. Her friends decided to come along. What a treasure they found! There were old newspapers of World War II, ancient looking candlesticks, wooden stools, jewelry holders and things of an era gone by. She and her friends carried mementos home to remember this adventurous trip. Her heart bubbled with joy. It was a great discovery.

Nayantara smiled remembering how free she felt that day. She had so much zest to live. Tears formed in her eyes as she sensed the change that came over her. ‘No! She is not dead. She is alive!’ she reminded herself and wiped those tears away.

THREE. A challenge. Nayantara loved to play badminton. She would play with her sister and father. She won most of the time. One day at school, she saw her PT teacher play badminton with some students. He beat them all one by one. She stood in line and waited for her turn. Soon it was her turn to play.

She surprised her teacher by winning the game. The teacher didn’t give in, he wanted another game. She won it too. One more game later, he lost again. ‘Ok! You are selected for the team!’ he said and quietly left. She was happy and surprised. She had played effortlessly and won!

Nayantara looked out of her window. Her eyes caught the sight of leaves dancing in the breeze. If only she could live her life with such abandon and joy.

FOUR. The self-learned rider. She longed to learn to ride a cycle. She had watched her father teach her elder sister how to ride. He had not offered to teach her so she decided she would learn herself. Her best friend in school was excited about the idea. They decided to learn to ride the cycle after writing their exam when no one was around. They checked to see which cycles were unlocked and borrowed them for riding. They fumbled and fell and almost got hurt too but soon learned to ride the cycle.

She decided to take it a step further and took the cycle for a ride on the main road. Since it was near school’s closing time, the main gates were open. She had an exhilarating ride on the road that afternoon. It was victory over fear. Her best friend and she celebrated that moment secretly. They returned the cycles to their places and went home.     

Nayantara hugged her pillow tightly. She now knew why her father had not offered to teach her cycling. Her mother told her that he had rejected her at birth because he wanted a boy. Memories played hide and seek with her. Some memories were unpleasant and painful. She tried to come to terms with them but her pain persisted.

She remembered a session she had with a therapist a few months earlier. It was then the truth reluctantly revealed itself. Tucked away in her psyche was the memory of something terrible that robbed her of her innocence. It was something that she could not come to terms with at the tender age of six. Her mind put it away to protect her.

Tears flowed down her cheeks and a cry tore through her being. She shrieked, ‘I hate my father!’ ‘What happened?’ enquired the therapist. She described the pieces of the memory she had found. The act that her father committed that desecrated her personhood, robbed her of herself and her purity.

‘Now it makes sense to me,’ she thought to herself. ‘Now I know why I felt odd and out of place in my family. Unlike her sisters’ she always felt odd around her father. She could never feel free with him.  

The sparks of who she really was could be seen only when she was with her best friend. She could be silly and laugh like crazy at mindless things. She could be curious, adventurous and naughty too.

FIVE. Fearless Nayantara. One day she and her best friend were wandering through the school when they heard the sound of flapping of wings coming from the top of the stairs. She realized some bird was trapped there. They rushed up and found an owl struggling to get out. The huge windows were closed so it couldn’t fly away. The owl was frightened. “How can we take this bird out of this place?’ she wondered. Just then a helper passed by and they asked him to help them catch the bird. He got a cloth and caught the owl with it. He gave the owl to her. She was excited as she held the bird.

As they wondered what to do they spotted the Vice-Principal coming that way. He was shocked to see her holding an owl! She said, ‘Father, we found this owl trapped upstairs, what should we do with it?’ ‘Take it to the mini-zoo’, he said. She and her friend went to the mini zoo and handed over the bird to the caretaker there. Both of them laughed a lot as they remembered the look of fear on the VP’s face when he saw the owl.

Nayantara kept the paper down. What would have happened if she had a normal life like others? All her life she tried so much to fit in and be accepted without knowing why she felt out of place. She even tried to give up things that made her ‘different’ so she would be acceptable. It only made things worse for her. She could not remember herself any more. In all the years, she did not feel at home even within herself. She took a deep breath. A sigh escaped her lips and she closed her eyes.

SIX. The class monitor. Some boys in her class liked to cause commotion. The Discipline In-charge had already given a warning. Nayantara was the monitor, minding her class in the absence of the teacher. The boys refused to listen to her.

The Discipline In-charge was soon at the door. He was angry. He asked her to name the boys who were making noise. She knew that he would give the boys the spanking of their lives if she told him their names. She kept quiet. She hoped that the boys would understand that she was saving them and would not make noise any more.  

The Discipline In-charge wouldn’t budge. ‘If you will not tell me their names then you will have to take the beating yourself! Put out your hand!’ Trying to keep herself calm as much as possible, she slowly brought her hand out. Swish! The sound of the flying cane followed and in seconds, she was in terrible pain. It was a sacrifice but that excruciating pain was worth it because the boys didn’t cross the line after that incident.

Brave girl! No one told her that. She had done something for someone else’s sake and borne the suffering and pain silently. Some of her classmates would surely have thought she was a fool but she didn’t think so. She remembered passing a corridor where the Discipline In-charge was punishing some boys. It was unbearable to watch it. She didn’t want her classmates to go through that pain. She cared.

SEVEN. The little birds twittered away happily as they ate the bajra grain she spread on the wall. She loved watching these tiny sparrows. Every day she would feed them and relish their company. It wasn’t just the birds, she had other friends too. They included dogs, cats, a squirrel, a parrot, a few turtledoves, pigeons, a colorful bird and any creature who needed help.

As long as she could remember, her family always seemed to have pets. She remembered the time when she would feel alone and cry on her own. Her pet dog would come and sit by her side during those moments of sadness.

Nayantara stood before the mirror. Her eyes asked her a question, ‘Who are you?’ She kept staring at herself and then quietly went to bed. As she lay on her bed, a thought crossed her mind. If she died this night, would anyone know about her life and who she was? Would anyone miss her? Her eyes were fixed on the ceiling. A blank wall stared back on her.

Her days were empty, there were no voices or smiles. There was hardly any difference between days. She began to detest the mind numbing routine. She craved for some distraction, something different to prove to herself that she was alive.

The next morning, she received a call. It was an unknown number. She felt skeptical. The phone rang and she didn’t move. Just as it was about to stop ringing she picked it up.

‘Hello! Is it you Nayantara?’ the voice of a man asked. ‘Who is it? What do you want?’ her voice was impatient. She was in no mood for anyone playing a prank.

‘Oh You seem to be angry! Madam… please cool down! I am your friend, your classmate. Don’t you remember me?’ ‘Which friend? What is your name?’ she asked irritated.

“You won’t know by my voice, we were in school together. The one way you can possibly remember who I am is – just one thing – I am the boy who punched you on the nose! We were in the 8th standard then…’

‘Punched me?’ she thought. Oh yes! There was only boy who had done that to her. Yes, how could she forget?

‘Well, all that is fine, but you still have to tell me your name!’ she said smiling.

‘It’s me… Viraaj! I’m sorry I actually forgot you were a girl when I punched your nose. You were my buddy! I just got your number and wanted to find out how you are doing,’ he said eagerly.

Nayantara was beaming. ‘Oh Viraaj! It is really you! I am so happy to hear your voice!’ she said. 

‘What are you doing these days?’ he asked. ‘I’m…. I’m on a project, a personal project,’ she replied. ‘What kind of project is it?’ he asked.

‘A search for a missing person,’ she said.
‘That sounds interesting! Can I help?’ he asked.

‘You already did Viraaj,’ she thought to herself. That would be EIGHT.
‘Yes. Of course! You can help,’ she said.

‘Let’s meet! Priya is also with me. If you are free we could have coffee together,’ he said.
‘Sure. That would be great! Let’s plan something…’ she was excited.

The next evening they sat at a table reminiscing their school days. ‘You were good in studies but I was better than you in some subjects,’ Viraaj said smiling. ‘Do you remember the time when we both were selected to represent the school at an elocution competition?’

‘Oh yes! I remember….’ She mentally made a note. NINE.

‘I wanted to ask you something… if it is not a problem,’ Priya said.    
‘It’s okay… you can ask me,’ Nayantara said.

‘After sometime you became very quiet and reserved. It felt like something had gone wrong. I missed my old friend… the way you used to be. I always wondered what had happened to her,’ she said looking at her intensely.

Nayantara’s eyes were wet. She could feel a lump in her throat. She said, ‘Someone robbed her from me… I am searching for her. I feel lost without her… as though I am not me.’ Her tears streamed down.

Priya bent forward and held her hands. Nayantara felt comforted.

Viraaj looked at her with concern. ‘Is that the search for the missing person you’re on?’ Viraaj asked. She nodded.

‘Then I am sure we can help… You see, we used to know this girl… many years ago,’ he said with a smile.

She smiled through her tears of gratitude. 

(Copyright Henrietta Decruz 2016)


Receiving the prize at the Rama Varma Club in Ernakulam, 2nd Oct 2016


The Special Consolation Prize I received

01 April 2014

#NOAH the film - How much Truth and how many Lies?


I didn't get to meet the real #NOAH... instead I met an impostor who is doing his best to spoil Noah's name!  A big thumbs down to the makers of this film. If they couldn't do justice to the story of Noah... they shouldn't have made this film!!! Instead someone who really knew and understood the story in the right way should have made the film.
I think this is a clarion call to the Christian Filmmakers - Rise up and make films related to our faith before those who hate God and His people make stuff like this to pollute people's thinking!!!

Friends, there are several elements added to the story of Noah which have changed both the characters and the story totally. So much so that except for a very few things the rest is all a web of lies!

The film maker has used his creative license so much that he changed the story from the original. Like for instance he shows Noah's younger two sons did not have wives.

Well, that is too far from the truth. Genesis 6:18 says "But I will establish My covenant with you; and you shall enter the ark—you and your sons and your wife, and your sons' wives with you." And Genesis 7:7 says, "Then Noah and his sons and his wife and his sons' wives with him entered the ark because of the water of the flood."

As for the children born to Noah's sons, another LIE inserted into the story... the film shows the birth of twin daughters whom Noah wanted to kill, nothing can be further from the truth. There was no birth inside the Ark at all! There was no question of Noah killing anyone - He would never kill even a living thing! Why would a person like that want to kill girl twins??? Desperate to cause hate towards Noah and God - the filmmakers have proved they just don't want to tell the story honestly!

The sons of Noah had children only AFTER they settled on the land. Genesis 10:1-4 says this, "This is the history of the generations (descendants) of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth. The sons born to them after the flood were: 2 The sons of Japheth: Gomer, Magog, Madai, Javan, Tubal, Meshech, and Tiras. 3 The sons of Gomer: Ashkenaz, Riphath, and Togarmah. 4 The sons of Javan: Elishah, Tarshish, Kittim, and Dodanim. 

The other thing the film does is insert something called 'Watchers' or fallen angels who are supposed to be helping Noah build his Ark. Nothing could be further from the Truth as the fallen angels are more associated with Satan, God's arch enemy and would have never be involved in anything even remotely related to God or His people. Revelation 12:9 says, "And the huge dragon was cast down and out—that age-old serpent, who is called the Devil and Satan, he who is the seducer (deceiver) of all humanity the world over; he was forced out and down to the earth, and his angels were flung out along with him." [Amplified] Why would such beings have anything to do with Noah, a man chosen by God?

The movie has another insertion that is entirely untrue. It shows a character called Tubal-Cain, who is a descendant of Cain enter the Ark undetected. The Bible story does not have any stowaways! Moreover, there was no chance anyone could enter like that since Genesis 7:16 says, " And they that entered, male and female of all flesh, went in as God had commanded [Noah]; and the Lord shut him in and closed [the door] round about him." It was God Himself who sealed the Ark, no one could go through Him and stay alive anyway.  

As for God and His nature - Genesis 6:5-7 says, "The Lord saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination and intention of all human thinking was only evil continually. And the Lord regretted that He had made man on the earth, and He was grieved at heart. So the Lord said, I will destroy, blot out, and wipe away mankind, whom I have created from the face of the ground—not only man, [but] the beasts and the creeping things and the birds of the air—for it grieves Me and makes Me regretful that I have made them."

Man can bear seeing men kill other men... we have grown accustomed to seeing riots and violence where tens, hundreds and thousands of people perish. But not God... it hurts His heart to see the men He created doing this to one another. He wants us to love one another - not kill one another. That is why it grieved His heart... and He decided to give man a fresh start through Noah, a "just and righteous man, blameless in his [evil] generation; Noah walked [in habitual fellowship] with God" Genesis 6:9 [Amp]

The film also shows that Noah made choices that mankind should end and that God wanted all men to perish. However that is also far from the truth. Genesis 8:1 says "GOD [earnestly] remembered Noah and every living thing and all the animals that were with him in the ark." And in Genesis 8:15-16 it says, "God spoke to Noah, saying, 'Go forth from the ark, you and your wife and your sons and their wives with you.'"

If God really wanted He could have destroyed all mankind and none of us would have been here to know the real or distorted story of Noah!

So see the movie but also go back and read Genesis 8 to Genesis 10 to know the REAL STORY. Here is a link that will take you to the online Amplified Bible - my favorite version of the Bible! Read Genesis 8 to 10 - Amplified Bible
Don't let anyone put wool over your eyes!!! Please go back and check everything that is said so that you don't have to swallow lies and be made a fool of! Knowing the Truth makes a huge difference... it can affect your life on earth and afterwards too. You are precious and your soul is too! 

Take the trouble to know the truth. Please do it for your own sake!


26 February 2014

Turn the Page

You’ve lingered on this page
for too long.
There is nothing more written here
Move on.

Image from Internet - by Cliparea
Turn the Page! 
Turn the page
Start a new chapter
Go to the next level
Your journey will continue
From there.

A full stop is an end
The end of the line.
Your story doesn’t end
With the full stop on this page
It takes on a new form
Turn the page!

As you move towards your destiny
Adventure beckons you
Dormant dreams will come to life.
The things that confined you
Will not hold you back anymore.
They will be left behind
In the previous chapter!

Your heart has grown weary
With waiting I know...
Is it ever going to happen?
You wonder.
A refreshing is right around the corner
It will rekindle your hope
Don’t worry!

Just turn the page
Let it go
The chapters before are just a setting
To unfold the climax of your life.
You too will not believe it
If it were told you
What the Writer has written for you.